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Why is change so damn hard?

Change is hard.

Bloody hard.

Watching those we love change into someone we don’t recognise is heartbreaking. Memories of how that person once was can flood our minds – holding on to those previous memories feels so important when we see our loved one slipping away from us.



We feel helpless, hopeless …. even question the absurdity of this existence and how it’s even possible that our life and the people we love can change so much. This life that we rarely question unless we have been affected by profound change – and we start to wonder what’s the meaning of it, what are we here to learn? Any if so, why does learning have to be so difficult and painful?

We tell our children to enjoy the learning of their brief school years (that stretches out interminably for them!) and yet as fully-fledged adults we too are constantly learning/evolving, except it can feel, at times, as though we are wading through heavy mud.

There are no solutions – no quick formula to readily cope with change when it comes when we don’t want it to.

Once thing we can know for sure, is that it will happen, we don’t know where or when or how but things will change and we need to adapt … somehow. And not just for you and I but for everyone.

So why aren’t we SHOUTING about it, why aren’t we teaching our children to be resilient towards it? We love them and think we’re protecting them by wrapping them up in cotton wool when they feel the first uncomfortable feelings of change, but we’re not allowing them to learn and tap into their own inner resources, which we all have within us, to find our own way of coping with the eternal changes of our environment.

Think about it – really think about it. How/did you learn to cope with change? Albeit small, insignificant events or maybe a major change was thrust upon your life at a tender age.

Do you feel you learnt the coping skills to adapt to change? Or was it a cold, hard shock that came out of the blue and knocked you sideways? How did you cope?

What can we teach each other to learn coping mechanisms that will equip us with the necessary internal strength and resilience to manage transitions in our life?

What coping mechanisms have you found to be successful in managing change? I’d love to hear your comments and share with others.

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